Attraction 101

Are you attractive?
Did you really just say, no?
Stop that right now.
Here are four ingredients for you to whip up a batch of personalized magnetism.
1. One Giant Scoop of Positive Mindset
A positive mindset is paramount. Without it, all the other ingredients are stale. Seek beauty in others. There are some dark souls out there in the world. Especially with the onset of a global pandemic, systemic racism in the media forefront, and a terse mask debate at hand, it seems keeping a positive mindset may be a challenge some days. To refocus, find genuine compliments to give to the people around you. Complements help you to see positive behaviors, traits, or skills. Yep, you will need to look. The person receiving the compliment is lucky enough to hear your thought and feel connected to you. Look for the good in humans, and you will find it and in-turn feel connected with them.

2. A shovel full of Selfcare
Do you look tired? If you look tired, you may be distracting from your inner character. Take care of yourself is an understatement. You are the only you, you have. The vast majority of us can step this up. Sleeping, eating healthier, and getting more physical exercise are huge steps in the right direction. Feeling better about your physical self will help present your best emotional and competent self. In that case, also get your hair cut and take care of your skin.

3. A colossal dose of interesting
Shut off your tv. I have been on too many dates where we try to connect over the TV shows we watch rather than quality topics. There are a gazillion things to do other than Netflix and chill. I know. I like it too sometimes. So, at least cut back to watching only what you enjoy. Hours of TV every night does not create energy or magnetism. So let’s substitute. Interesting activities can make you an interesting person. Learn to play an instrument. Garden. Learn to cook. Learn to throw a pot. Read. Learn to skateboard. Volunteer. Get some chickens. Do anything you enjoy, and it will make you more interesting. The most attractive man I know does not even own a TV. You can change your habit.

4. A customized set of standards
Standards or boundaries are behaviors that we exhibit to demonstrate to others what we stand for and where we draw a metaphorical emotional line. Defining expectations can be challenging at various points in our lives. And yet, so easy when we judge other people.
I’d never wear that. I’d never eaten that, or I’d love to eat that. Did you smell Joe? I’m always the last to leave work. All my kids make their beds. I’d never go home with a man before he said he loved me. I’d never quit a job before I had another. I’d never date someone who lived in a van down by the river.

Are your standards contributing to a better you? Setting standards that help you with a positive mindset, self-care, and indulging in meaningful activities without judgment of others is ideal. Set your standards to be achievable, and keep them high. High standards are more attractive than low or average standards.

Your income is irrelevant; it is about values. For example, you don’t have to be wealthy to have a clean, well-kept home. What are you standing for?

Lastly, stir in all the confidence you have for the winning combination. Keep your mixture together with confidence glue. Your confidence is also giving you the ability to crack a joke, or apologize, or state your thoughts. You need to know (be confident) you are attractive; and yet, you can continue to improve.

Once you have all your ingredients stirred together with confidence, insert your mix in your heart and continue to bake, basting regularly. Enjoy.